


Define Fake

by BabyBarnOwl



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Cultural Differences, Fake Marriage, M/M, Mutual Pining, Ridiculous
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-22
Updated: 2017-06-22
Packaged: 2018-11-17 10:16:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11273430
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BabyBarnOwl/pseuds/BabyBarnOwl
Summary: Uliro Fake Marriage AU.A little exert from Chapter 4 that got this whole fic started.“This is my mate, husband,” Ulaz introduced, correcting himself to the human word for partner at the end. The small, area 51 looking alien stepped forwards, extending two hands for their native, very formal, greeting, of a hug.“My grandest greeting, Husband. You have a most unusual name, I am sure it is very fertile.” the alien greeted. Shiro had no idea what that meant, but it sounded good.“Thank you, it is an unusual name, even among my people, but it was chosen for its fertility. I am so pleased you noticed,” Shiro replied. He could see Ulaz’s ear twitch in annoyance. The man had an amazing poker face, but even he was starting to crack under Shiro’s constant pettiness. The use of husband was likely meant as a gesture of caring to Shiro, and having it openly mocked was no doubt grating, but Shiro was beyond caring at this point. He was beyond caring three public make out sessions ago, and had pointedly decided that he hates Galra courting.The little green alien, on the other hand, seemed delighted by Shiro’s words.





	Define Fake

Shiro bounced from foot to foot as he raised his arms into a fighting stance. The punching bag in front of him swayed from his last hit. He breathed out slowly, trying to pace himself. Sweat was trickling down his bare chest and arms, making him glisten under the white altean lights. One particularly uncomfortable bead of sweat trail down between his shoulder blades, along his spine, towards his ass.

He threw a punch, making the sweat that shone on his arms jump, and his chest heave with a quick exhale of breath.

"Shiro?" Allura's voice called from the air, "Shiro, we need you at the bridge. Please respond."

Shiro paused.

"I can hear you princess," he answered, looking up at the ceiling unnecessarily. She was using the intercom system so she couldn't see him.

"We need you on the bridge immediately," Allura repeated, "we have a request from the Blades of Marmora."

"I'll be right there," Shiro replied, relaxing his stance, and pulling his towel off a nearby bench. He buried his face into the soft fabric, and scrubbed hard. Pulling his face out, he made a contented sigh, and then slung the towel across his shoulders before pulling on a tank top that had been kindly provided by Coran earlier. It had the black lion’s logo across it's chest.

Shiro's sweat made the top sick to his chest, and back, outlining each of his muscles. Shiro left it, the team had all seen it before in training, and made his way towards the bridge.

When he got there Allura, and Coran were facing a large screen displaying Kolivan, and Ulaz. They all turned their attention to him as he walked in.

"O-Oh! Shiro, were you training?" Allura asked, her face looked a little pink. Shiro hoped he hadn't walked in on an argument.

He smiled at her as he stepped up to stand next to her, "yes, sorry for the messy appearance."

"No need to apologise," She replied, making occasional glances towards him, but not meeting his eyes.

Kolivan cleared his throat, "Princess, Black Paladin, our mission."

"Yes, of course," Allura said, glancing to Kolvian, before turning to face Shiro, "the blades have requested our assistance in one of their mission. As far as they have explained, they need a non-galra to accompany them on an infiltration mission."

"Non-galra?" Shiro asked.

Kolivan answered, "the species we need to infiltrate is under Galra rule, but not willingly. Ulaz has managed to befriend a possible resistance conspirator, but they do not fully trust him yet. They are an overly romantic species. Ulaz felt it beneficial to create a persona with hidden affections for creatures of other species. It is highly frowned upon in the Galra empire, and so called 'forbidden love' seems very popular with this species. We need a non-galra mate to corroborate his claims, and help win their trust." 

Allura looked entirely serious, and behind her Coran was nodding in a sagely manner. The two Galra were as stoic as ever, Shiro, on the other hand, was trying not to let his mouth hang open. Kolivan's explanation had sounded very reasonable, but what it actually meant was ridiculous.

"You want me to pretend to be dating Ulaz?"

"Dating?" Kolivan asked, seeming confused.

"No, no," Coran replied, almost laughing, and Shiro took a breath of relief, "married, would be a more accurate term."

"Married?" Shiro squeaked, his unusually high pitch making Kolivan, and Ulaz's ears twitch.

"Is that an accurate translation?" Ulaz asked, speaking for the first time, "a misunderstanding could be fatal to our mission."

"Well, I suppose there's no direct translation, but it is the closest your cultures share. Marriage, and long term mating, are very similar things." Coran clarified, twiddling his moustache as he spoke.

"It will do," Kolivan cut in with, "yes, we require you to be married to Ulaz for this mission."

Shiro didn't know how to reply to that. He was the leader of a team that piloted giant robot cats that combined to form a giant robot biped with lion heads for hands and feet, but this was by far the most ridiculous thing he had ever been asked to do.

"I-why me?" was all he could think to ask.

"You get along with Ulaz the best out of all of us," Allura replied. Shiro supposed he could see the logic in that. The Altean's had lost their home world to the Galra, there was no way they could comfortably pretend to be married to Ulaz, and Shiro didn't want the other doing this. They'd likely make a joke out of the whole thing, and as ridiculous as it was, something like that could get them killed.

"I see..."

"Do you accept the mission?" Kolivan asked. Shiro turned to lock eyes with the Galra, and then looked to Ulaz,

"Yes, I accept," he replied, and for a second he would have sworn that a small smile appeared on Ulaz's face.

"Good, we'll send you all the information you need, and a meeting point. You'll need to know your new background inside out. You won't be the Champion for this mission, you'll be Ulaz's love drowned mate."

-

Shiro sat alone in a large clearing. Behind his back was a large rock, and above him the sky was a clear blue. This was the meeting point that Ulaz had specified, but currently there was no sign of any Galra, allied or otherwise. Shiro watched the sky, waiting for some kind of ship to descend.

To his left a twig snapped, prompting him to turn in that direction.

"You're unusually lax," came the familiar voice of Ulaz as he made his way towards Shiro.

"You blades are always overly cautious, I knew this place would be safe," Shiro replied. Ulaz made a sound that closely resembled a snort.

"Let's get on with this mission before your lack of vigilance kills you," Ulaz said, stopping short of Shiro and holding up a bag.

"Not even a hi first?" Shiro teased.

"Hi," Ulaz deadpanned as he opened up the bag and began pulling out pieces of cloth. Shiro sighed, but was smiling, and he made his way towards Ulaz, who had now emptied the bag.

In his hands were two identical outfits, he extended one towards Shiro, "here, put this on."

Shiro took the clothing from Ulaz and held it up. It was a blue and red jumpsuit that looked a little off in size.

"I," Shiro paused, unsure of how to word what he wanted to say, "are you sure this will fit me?"

"No, it won't," was Ulaz's short reply.

When Shiro raised an eyebrow at him the alien added, "it's not designed to fit you, it's mine."

"Yours?"

"Yes, as I said, mine." Ulaz didn't seem to comprehend Shiro's surprise, and instead started stripping off his own armour, and underneath jumpsuit.

"Ulaz!" Shiro barked as the fabric reached the aliens hips. Ulaz's hands paused, and he looked up at Shiro.

"Yes?" He asked, calm as ever.

"You-you-, why are you stripping?" Shiro stuttered, a flush colouring his face.

Ulaz furrowed his eyebrows, "I cannot properly infiltrate this species dressed as a soldier," he explained slowly. Shiro took a moment to calm himself down before speaking.

"That's not what I mean. You can't just strip in front of other people."

"I can't? I do not see anything to physically stop me," Ulaz replied, and Shiro wasn't entirely sure if he was teasing him, or being serious.

"That's-," Shiro began, trying, again, to think how to correctly word things.

"Not what you mean," Ulaz cut in, "I presume that in earth culture it is not considered appropriate."

"Yes," Shiro replied, sightly relieved. Whilst Ulaz's facial expression did not change, Shiro got the feeling, partially from his voice, that the man found this to be an inconvenience. 

"It is not safe to be separated, we do not know what lurks in the shadows of this planet," he said.

Shiro looked down at the jumpsuit in his hands with an unhappy expression. He knew that he was being silly, it wasn't that inappropriate given the situation, but he hadn't changed in front of anyone since his imprisonment, and he wasn't quite ready for that, even if it was with Ulaz.

Ulaz made a strange noise, which had Shiro looking up at him, "fine," Ulaz said, turning away, his ears drooped unhappily, "we shall both turn away from each other. Is that acceptable?"

Shiro blinked for a moment, and then smiled, "yes, thank you."

Ulaz's ears twitched upwards just before Shiro turned away from him.

Shiro pulled off his clothes as quickly as he could, still feeling self-conscious about his scars, but he trusted Ulaz not to look. He paused when he held up the jumpsuit to put it on. It wasn't exactly the most attractive clothing he'd ever seen, but a mission was a mission, and he had to wear it.

It wasn't hard to put on, but he'd been right about it not fitting. The fabric was too tight around his hips, and ass, and too lose on his shoulders, so that it hung off him strangely.

When Shiro turned back around to Ulaz the alien still had his back to him.

"I'm done," Shiro said, picking at the loose fabric around his shoulders, trying to make it look at least a little presentable.

Ulaz turned around, and looked Shiro up, and down, before suddenly grinning. It startled Shiro, he didn't think he'd ever seen that expression on him.

"It doesn't fit," Shiro said lamely.

"It's perfect," Ulaz disagreed, making Shiro chuckle.

"We match," Shiro added as he got a good look at what Ulaz was wearing. It was an exact replica of Shiro's outfit, except it fit him.

Then, a suddenly realisation dawned on Shiro, “we’re wearing a couple’s outfit.”

“Of course, we are,” Ulaz replied, completely unaware of the earth culture surrounding that fact, “we are mates,” Shiro grinned at Ulaz, and his happy expression made the alien narrow his eyes, “am I missing something?”

“No! no,” Shiro replied, still grinning, “So, what next?”

“…my contact will be here shortly to escort us to the home planet of the species we are to infiltrate.”

“What are they called again?”

“Pragma.”

**Author's Note:**

> I started this on Tumblr and decided to add it to this site for anyone who doesn't use Tumblr.
> 
> This fic get more ridiculous the further into it we get :D


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